Changing while Dancing

“Wherever you go, go with all your heart” -Confucius

Repatterning is a work in progress, a dance that continues, a way of moving through world of time and space.

Reality kicks in. The day begins just like the days before all of the great resolutions. With the same place, the same people, the same patterns. We are pattern makers. Change is hard. We love our routines, our cozy ruts, especially in the wintertime.

We are creatures of habit, in a universe of cycles, living in a carefully synchronized world of measured and numbered repetitions we love to expect and count on.

You can’t stop the world spinning, you can only go with the flow. So the only way to change is to first acknowledge the rhythms and own the ones you dance to. And own that you probably don’t want to change all that much.

If you are reading this, you have already come a long way. You have created many patterns you like. But you also want to go on learning, growing, improving, or you wouldn’t be here. So how to change, yet keep what you like?

It helps to identify what your patterns are providing you, what needs they are trying to meet. Ask, if this is something I want to change or adjust, or let go of, and what can I fit into its place to meet the same need?

The replacement gets slotted into the pattern, but it is more conscious, more elegant. The new habit is of a higher order.

Small, incremental changes, baby steps in the right direction are just as good as giant leaps, which can easily bounce you right back to where you were, or worse. Big sweeping changes will often just sweep you off your feet and out of your balance. Better to find a stride you can keep doing a little at a time, making progress slowly but surely. Crash programs cause crashes.

Let each step be easy, but soon you can see it adds up to some real elevation gained, and you are rewarded with a feeling of progress.

Find a spot in your already established patterns for each new tweak. Schedule the one time or once in a while things you want to do, and build in a reward of some kind at the same time.

But there is a benefit to the act of pattern interruption. A vacation from the whole cycle, just to get perspective so you can reassess. 

The best way to do this is to physically go somewhere different, away from all of the cues to your regular habits. See if you can break free of stuck patterns for a short period; try out new ways of being yourself. 

The trick here is to have a way to apply your insights when you return to the familiar environment and people. If you deny needs and aspects of yourself, those will assert themselves and break out eventually, possibly in ways that harm your confidence and will to change. Make a list, make a plan. Write out your feelings and insights. The key is to know yourself, what you want, and align all the parts. To be congruent. 

“Wherever you are is where it is at.”-unknown

I wonder what we will see shift next.